Tags: cliff williams

Breakfast Club // Gotcha.

Day Five Is It Now?: To Hear Your Voice...


I talked to Malcolm today; talked to them all, in fact.

They finally let me call them up, call home. And God, I think I could’ve raped the phone just from hearing Malcolm say hello. I couldn’t speak for a moment, was absolutely terrified to, and then I just started to cry. I cried. I’m here for five days and I’m acting as if I’ve been gone for five years.

Malcolm sounded happy enough to hear from me, pleased. I think I might’ve scared him though, what with sobbing in his ear and all.

And I got to talk to Phil, bless his heart, he actually sounded like he missed me. I figured, if anyone, he’d be the least so to care since he’s the easiest to annoy; so I did often. I don’t mean to…ok, well I do, but it’s hard not to. Phil makes the funniest faces when he gets pissed.

I got to talk to Cliff too. What was nice about him was the fact he didn’t talk to me all careful, and he didn’t once mention RainyDay in our conversation. He talked to me like, well, like to buddies on the phone catching up with each other. But then again, Cliff isn’t the brightest person on the face of this planet, so for all I know he probably forgot I was even here.

He asked me if I’d met any chicks, which only fueled the idea he had none at all where I truly was. But I laughed, told them they were pretty and carried on…

And then I talked to Bon…

Well, at first we didn’t talk. I think we really just listened to each other breathe for about five minutes before we started to try and speak. I had no idea what to say. Usually? I can talk to him for hours on and suddenly…I’m completely blank. Now that’s a first.

I can’t remember who started, but one of us did and it was a jumble from there. Stuff flying from every direction on how the other was doing, what were they up to, anything new, and just---all this crazy shit and I felt like I had run a marathon in the end. And I was laughing! I think the doctor might’ve thought I was crazy. I mean, ten minutes ago I was sobbing, and now? I’m laughing my ass off.

And then he asked me something, and I know he meant it as a joke but I---I panicked.

Find someone to replace me yet?

It was like the erratic pulse of a heart: Izzy, Izzy, Izzy, oh fuck Izzy, what do I say? I think I made a mistake, what do I do? Did I make a mistake? I couldn't have. I wanted it, didn’t I? Oh fuck…

How do you tell someone…that you…that you went behind their back? In the fucking loony bin no less!? And I wanted to tell him, just spill it and get it over with to see what happens…and the doctor takes the phone. *scowls*

So, now I’m stuck trying to figure out what to do. And I’ve never been one for solving puzzles…*sigh*